The Calendar Post

[shapinglight]

Have to admit that after the slight unpleasantness to do with next year's BtVS calendar, the shine has rather gone off doing these posts for me. However, it's so close to the end of the year, that I feel I must soldier on to the bitter end. England expects, etcetera, etcetera.

Last month this happened. Now read on.



Unfortunately for Angel, when he ran away from Clueless Perky Buffy at the end of the previous post, he allowed himself to be distracted by a mouth-watering display of chocolates in a shop window and Buffy caught him.

Buffy (pulling): Not so fast, mister. I'm not done with you yet.
Angel (clinging to the nearest lamp post): He-elp! I'm being vamp-napped.
(Naturally, no one takes any notice of this. They just assume that it's a Halloween jolly jape that's gone over the time limit - you know, the way people sometimes have fireworks on the nearest weekend to November 5th, instead of on the day itself)
Back in Buffy's lair headquarters, Angel cowers in terror while Buffy continues to be scarily perky.
Buffy: I was thinking, you have pictures of everyone now for yours and Spike's two year anniversary wedding album, including some way cute ones of me - plus a great pic of Spike's favourite couple in all the world, you and me. How about if you finish it off with a picture of some of his greatest nemesises - er, whatever.
Angel (glad it's not worse): Um - okay. :thinks: That was a lucky escape. I thought she was going to say Spike would like nude pictures of her and me, or worse, nude pictures of Xander.
:feels like he's had a lucky escape:
Buffy (rummaging in the photo box again: How about one of these guys?
:Angel stares at the top small picture, which is of the Gentlemen:
Angel: Scary.
Buffy (shudders): You're right. They're too scary. Maybe we'll forget about them and go for this guy instead?
:She shows Angel the middle small picture, which is of Caleb:
Angel (frowns): The evil man of the cloth, huh? Not one of your better nemesises-es -er, whatever. Besides, guy looks like a codfish. Not scary enough.
Buffy (giggles): You're right. He does - and isn't. Lame!
:Discards that picture too:
Buffy: How about this one? I'm sure Spike remembers her with affection.
:Shows Angel the third small picture, which is of Glory, in a much sluttier red dress than any of the ones she wore in the show:
Angel: Er - you really think Spike wants to be reminded of the hell god who almost tortured him to death?
Buffy (blinks): When you put it like that- :brightens: I know! What Spike really wants is another picture of me. And anyway, since I'm the one who put an end to his Big Bad career and first pushed him onto the straight and narrow, I guess I count as his biggest nemesis anyway.
Angel: I guess you do at that. :Thinks: Is it over yet? Can I go home?
:They spend five blissful (for Buffy) minutes going through yet more old photographs, and finally choose one of Buffy from circa season 5, wearing a decidedly weird outfit:
Buffy: Look at me working those leather pants, huh?
Angel (thinks): They make your thighs look fat - which I didn't think was possible.
:But he doesn't say it. Instead, he takes the picture and slinks off home - not forgetting to visit the chocolate shop on the way. After all that's happened, he needs some comfort food.

Tune in again next month for the last ever calendar post.

Comments

[sueworld2003.livejournal.com]

Aww bless, Poor old chubby Angel...*g*

[shapinglight]

Yes, he'll have to watch out, or Spike's 2 year anniversary present to him is going to be a subscription to Weight Watchers.

[sueworld2003.livejournal.com]

*snerk* What a great icon!

[shapinglight]

It's good, isn't it? Snag away if you want. Was made by kornpeep, who used to be Kornpeep.

[diachrony.livejournal.com]

Angel's just so adorkable in these posts of yours. ::pinches his cheeks::

[shapinglight]

I agree. He's a cutiepie.

:pets him:

[elisi]

I like perky Buffy! Who *is* the dating herself btw? (It's possible you mentioned it at some point, but my memory is not so much.)

[http://users.livejournal.com/woman_of_/]

Oh Angel, a lucky escape! Will miss the calender posts, but do not buy or support the calenders myself anymore!

[shapinglight]

I think she's in a sort of on/off threesome with Angel and Spike.

[shapinglight]

but do not buy or support the calenders myself anymore!

Sadly, no. They blew it this year. I'm just glad Amazon agreed to give me my money back.

[mere-ubu.livejournal.com]

Buffy (blinks): When you put it like that- :brightens: I know! What Spike really wants is another picture of me. And anyway, since I'm the one who put an end to his Big Bad career and first pushed him onto the straight and narrow, I guess I count as his biggest nemesis anyway.

Angel: I guess you do at that. :Thinks: Is it over yet? Can I go home?

Bwahahaa! Poor Angel has had the patience of a saint with this little project. Such trials! I confess that I've been saving these last two calendar posts since they are indeed the last two. I'm going to go savor the other one now.

[shapinglight]

Yes, poor Angel! I really put him through the wringer.

Seem to have done that all over this year.

:pets him: