Tea Wars

[shapinglight]

A while back, I asked people for fic prompts. Not a lot has come of them because I'm still struggling with my writing. Today, for instance, I wrote 1200 words of the next in my Spike/Giles AU season 7 series, which, yes, sounds good, but every single word felt like blood squeezed out of a stone and I was so desperate to stop that carrying on was like a form of mental torture.

But anyway, I did write a drabble from one of the prompts. It's a sort of companion piece to Size Matters, in which a clueless Buffy runs foul of an obscure(ish) Britishism. This isn't quite the same, in that I don't think tea duelling is an obscure Britishism. I've been a Brit all my life and I'd never heard of it until daiseechain gave me the prompt. However, if I haven't heard of it, I thought there was a good chance that Buffy wouldn't have either.

The rules for tea duelling are (apparently), as follows:

You face your opponent down across a table, each of you with a cup of hot, milky, tea in front of you, dunk your regulation rich tea biscuit into the tea up to a minimum of 3/4 of the biscuit length for a count of five seconds. Then you pull your biscuit out and the last person to eat the biscuit without having it splosh all over them is the winner. Managing to eat the biscuit is called a 'Nom'.

Setting: The usual bonkers AU BtVS-verse
Pairing: Spike/Giles (or possibly Spike and Giles, it hardly matters)
Rating: G
Author's note: the preamble is at least three times as long as the actual fic. How embarrassing!

Tea Wars



"All right, Watcher, let's see what you got."

Buffy paused on the threshold. That didn't sound good.

"Enough talk. Choose your weapon," Giles growled.

"Noo!" Buffy barrelled across the room, knocking Spike down and pinning him to the rug. "Don't be a dumbass, Giles. You can't fight Spike. You're way too old. It's suicide."

There was a stunned silence. Then Giles said, "Botheration!"

Buffy looked Giles's way. There was spilt tea all over the table and Giles was splattered with soggy cookie. "Huh?"

Spike smirked. "Thanks for the assist, Slayer." He wolfed down his own crumbling cookie. "Nom. I win."

Comments

[speakr2customrs.livejournal.com]

I presume it must be a New Zealandism.

[shapinglight]

I think possibly a studentism.

[quinara]

It's never got round my way, but we are somewhat of a backwater when it comes to student rituals - without talking to Outsiders I would never have known about strawpedos or double-parking. (Though I was part of a seminar where we had to gently inform an American that she really shouldn't call it double-fisting when she turned up with two cups of coffee...)

Anyway, great drabble! Buffy's cluelessness always tickles me. :D

[shapinglight]

without talking to Outsiders I would never have known about strawpedos or double-parking.

Er...what? Which? What? On the other hand....

(Though I was part of a seminar where we had to gently inform an American that she really shouldn't call it double-fisting when she turned up with two cups of coffee...)

:snorfle:

[quinara]

Double-parking, as I understand it, is the UK equivalent of double-fisting (which I can't even type without going o.O ), so having two drinks at once, ie. going to a 2-4-1 Happy Hour and getting both drinks for yourself and wondering around with them. Which I have done, just not called it anything. A strawpedo is when you (apparently; never done this) use a straw in a bottle of drink, like a WKD or something (though according to Urban Dictionary people can do it with wine(!!!)) so that you can down the bottle extra quickly. I think you put the straw down the bottom of the bottle and out to the side of your mouth, so as you swallow the liquid the straw pulls air into the bottle, rather than leaving you with that vacuum that sucks the bottle against your face. I sort of get that it's impressive or something, but I've always quite liked to enjoy my drinks rather than down them, so I've never been much interested in seeing someone try it.

[shapinglight]

:shakes head:

Young people today, I don't know!

[whichclothes.livejournal.com]

I never heard of tea wars either, but this was funny.

[shapinglight]

:) Thank you.

[sueworld2003.livejournal.com]

*snerk* Excellent. :D

[shapinglight]

:) Thanks, Sue.

[slaymesoftly.livejournal.com]

Never heard of this particular contest, but it made for a funny ficlet. :)

[shapinglight]

Thank you. :) I think lots of us are clueless about it.

[rebcake.livejournal.com]

Hee! Buffy will use any excuse to tackle the fellow, won't she? (I suspect she fancies a man just like dear old "Dad").

[shapinglight]

Buffy will use any excuse to tackle the fellow, won't she?

She's obviously in denial, poor thing. :)

[yourlibrarian]

It made me laugh to think of this companion game to the American drinking game. Also the word "botheration" :D

[shapinglight]

It made me laugh to think of this companion game to the American drinking game

It is? What game is that and how do you play it? This could well be based on it, whatever it is.

[yourlibrarian]

Ha, no definitely not. Those involve taking drinks of alcohol every time some specified event happens. So, for example, one could have such a Buffy drinking game, taking a swig of something ever time Giles polishes his glasses or Spike says "bugger."

[shapinglight]

:) Someone should write a fic.

[rahirah]

Hee!

[shapinglight]

:)

[norwie2010.livejournal.com]

*grins*

That was adorkable - whatever direction is following from that.

[shapinglight]

Thank you very much. :)

[vic-amy-z.livejournal.com]

Nope, tea duelling is a new one on me too. But now I really want to play! Cute fic though, I could so see Spike and Giles playing this! [g]

[shapinglight]

Nope, tea duelling is a new one on me too. But now I really want to play!

It sounds like fun, if possibly a bit messy. ;)

[kseenaa.livejournal.com]

*LOL* That was brilliant! X-D

[shapinglight]

:) Thank you.

[relurker.livejournal.com]

Do I really have to care if this refers to a real thing? I loved the nerdiness of the preamble, that's effort enough for me to accept it...
I do enjoy this small thing, written just for a smile, but with a lot of attention.

[shapinglight]

I loved the nerdiness of the preamble, that's effort enough for me to accept it...

Heh! I'm a nerd. I freely admit it. Glad you enjoyed the drabble.

[candleanfeather.livejournal.com]

Tea duelling? It had to be invented. I can just imagine Gile's face and his "botheration". Wipes tears of laugh.

[shapinglight]

:)

I suppose it was probably Spike's idea, but then again....