The Stupid Dinosaur Movie

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Went to see Jurassic World last night.

I enjoyed it, but boy, was it stupid!

Spoilers behind cut



Also, while I appreciate that I'm hyper-sensitive to Brit-bashing in American movies, I did not like the way that the only dino-related death in the movie that was lingered over as if she somehow deserved it was that of the (blameless) Brit PA to the annoying lead female character, whose only 'crime' as far as I can see was not much wanting to chaperone her boss's nephews and looking a bit bored from time to time.

There was plenty of scientist-bashing too. The message of the film re science appeared to be that scientists are cold, heartless bastards who don't care what damage they do to people in the ruthless pursuit of new breakthroughs.

However, like the Brit-bashing (which may have been unintentional in this case) this is hardly new to Hollywood blockbusters.

That apart, my main quarrel with the film is that it opted to be a sequel to the previous ones, rather than a reboot of the original concept. This is because I find it inconceivable after what happened in the previous films that anyone would risk re-opening Jurassic Park/World, or that anyone would risk their safety or that of their families by visiting the place. That sea monster alone - as we saw from the (rather convenient) demise of the Indomisaurus (or whatever it was called)- could have eaten everyone in an entire row of seats in the aquarium any time it had wanted to do so.

I also didn't get why the velociraptors kept changing their minds about what side they were on, or believe that anyone - no matter how unscrupulous - would be stupid enough to believe that the raptors could be used as a weapon of war.

Bu-ut all this is taking it far too seriously. I enjoyed it. The kids weren't too annoying. The hero was okay, and even the annoying female lead had her good points - not least (despite what the hero said) the ability to run really fast in high heels.

Also, the dinosaurs looked great.

Doubt I'd watch it again, but it was okay.

Comments

[davesmusictank.livejournal.com]

I was going to see that but in the end i watched Mr. Holmes which i thought was a lovely movie about the retired consulting detective.

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Probably a much better bet.

[infinitewhale.livejournal.com]

I didn't care how it used the commentary on humanity's desire for spectacle as an excuse for doing it. Same beef I had with Cabin In the Woods, though at least JW didn't reinforce that it was need. Hence, we get nonsense like the completely over-the-top death of the assistant. The movie itself is Indominus Rex, we get it. Wanting your cake and eating it, too, is the big thing now, I guess.

I actually buy the government would at least look into weaponizing raptors. They wouldn't shell out for the research, but after JP, the US government totally would. I put nothing past any group who'd come up with napalm bats.

I'm still not sure if it's supposed to be a sequel to TLW and JP3 or a direct sequel to JP with shot-outs to the others. I know the directors sad the former, but the movie doesn't support it.

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Hence, we get nonsense like the completely over-the-top death of the assistant. The movie itself is Indominus Rex, we get it. Wanting your cake and eating it, too, is the big thing now, I guess.

Pretty much agree, and now you mention it, the OTT death of the assistant (as opposed to all the other deaths) wasn't just Brit-bashing, but also the PG-rated version of torture porn. None of the male deaths are lingered over in that way.

And I take your point about weaponizing animals already being a thing. I forgot about the spy dolphins. The article mentions the bat bombs too.

[infinitewhale.livejournal.com]

The sequel will probably have T-Rexes in F-14s, though.

and i will be first in line

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:Lines up behind you:

[ladypeyton.livejournal.com]

Pretty much agree, and now you mention it, the OTT death of the assistant (as opposed to all the other deaths) wasn't just Brit-bashing, but also the PG-rated version of torture porn. None of the male deaths are lingered over in that way.

Yes This. It made me very uncomfortable that yet again Hollywood had greenlit torture porn featuring a woman.

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It was pretty yucky. And even yuckier in retrospect.

[elisi]

It sounds like exactly what I expected! :)

There was plenty of scientist-bashing too. The message of the film re science appeared to be that scientists are cold, heartless bastards who don't care what damage they do to people in the ruthless pursuit of new breakthroughs.
Let's all go watch The Martian instead! :D



ETA: For some reason the alt!text isn't showing. Direct link.

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But does The Martian have dinosaurs?

[elisi]

Not as far as I know...

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An oversight on their part, obvs.

[elisi]

Probably an inherent problem with setting it on Mars.

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There might be dinosaurs on Mars. I mean, we don't know there aren't.

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

That's pretty much what I thought. Then again, I hated the first two movies too and never saw the third.

On the plus side, zookeepers all over the world have created #JurassicZoo.






And Chris Pratt, being a good sport, got in on it too:

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Those're great - especially the guy with the dino skeletons. And aww, those sea otters are adorable!

Jurassic Park 3 is actually my favourite out of all of the movies. I was never that keen on the original, and 2 is just plain awful.

This one was better than 2, but not by much.

I hated the first two movies.

Have to admit, I'm a sucker for anything with dinosaurs in it.

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

I love that one of the sea otters tries to high five him.

I'm a dinosaur geek from way back; I probably would have loved it if not for all the ridiculous Spielbergisms (plucky kids solving everything despite being roasted on electric fences and surviving, bad people getting eaten while good people get icecream, etc...)

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I love that one of the sea otters tries to high five him.

Sea otters are possibly the cutest animal that has ever, or will ever, exist. IMO. ;)

I agree the first film is full of Spielbergisms - some of them very irritating. For instance, he changed the two kids around from in the book, in which it's the girl who is the younger rather than the boy. Spielberg just seems to have this thing about small boys who get picked on by their older sisters getting their revenge because they're braver and smarter.

I'm assuming he has an older sister somewhere, who pushed him around when they were kids.

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

I got dragged along to see it yesterday, and predictably hated it. Or not hated, it's a decent enough romp at times, but I really couldn't get past the terminal stupidity of everyone involved, and the way the end basically turned the dinosaurs into characters straight out of the Ice Age movies. I wouldn't have been surprised if it had ended with the raptor and T-Rex swaggering off with their arms around each others' shoulders singing a song about how friends work together.

I did actually appreciate that they dared to up the body count and blood splatter a bit - the raptors were a lot scarier in this movie than they were in the first one, more like the ones in the book. But the death of the assistant left a very bad taste in my mouth; that really didn't serve any purpose but to establish that women with careers get what they deserve, did it? ETA: I guess my main problem is that the movie tries to be a family-friendly romp where good people (and immmortal children) always do well, while a few people find themselves in a deeply cynical horror movie. I love cynical, bloody horror movies, but when the same cinematic shorthand is used in a movie like this, it just looks sadistic.

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I love cynical, bloody horror movies, but when the same cinematic shorthand is used in a movie like this, it just looks sadistic.

I'm not a lover of anything bloody, but yeah, I agree. It really was like the kiddie version of torture porn.

I wouldn't have been surprised if it had ended with the raptor and T-Rex swaggering off with their arms around each others' shoulders singing a song about how friends work together.

Heh! It wouldn't have surprised me either. I still don't get why the raptors kept changing sides. Maybe it was a racist thing, and they decided they didn't like this indomisaurus thing having their DNA?

[beer-good-foamy.livejournal.com]

I still don't get why the raptors kept changing sides.

Maybe the Dominosaurus or whatever kept asking why they didn't have feathers like they should, and they just got sick of it?

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Or it sneered at them for being shortarses.

[thismaz.livejournal.com]

anyone ... would be stupid enough to believe that the raptors could be used as a weapon of war.

Reminds me of a story I heard on QI, I think, about a (American?) plan to train dogs to go under enemy tanks, with bombs on their backs. Yep, you got it, in the real situation they went and sheltered under the American tanks.

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That'll teach 'em.

[rebcake.livejournal.com]

I hated the first movie because of the bashing. Oh look, the fat person is greedy and messy! Look at all that food! Urgh. Really? You just spent a jillion dollars on awesome CGI dinosaurs, and you couldn't manage to make the humans passably real? Grrr. I very nearly walked out. Which I probably should have, because soon after I had a nightmare about a T-Rex chasing me in a parking garage. And it wasn't even the kind that wore platform boots and eyeliner, darnit!

So, yeah, I'll be missing this one, just like the others. Perhaps some more MMXXL will cheer me up, though.

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There's a lot I don't like about the first film. Lots of the wrong people get eaten, for a start.

[kseenaa.livejournal.com]

I've been a bit curious at it, I'll admit. I really enjoyed the old ones. So I might try to get my ass to the movies to see it. :-)

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It's worth sitting through once. Just. ;)