The Calendar Post

[shapinglight]

Yet again, the month is threatening to get way from me, so here is the Calendar Post, brought to you by what has turned out once more not to be the last ever BtVS calendar, though I hope it's the last that only consists of promo pictures.

Last month, this happened. Now read on.



Those of you in possession of this calendar will be thinking (grumpily, if you're not a Bangel 'shipper) that according to the calendar people, this month appears to be Bangel month. However, I can now exclusively reveal that this is not the case. Not at all. In fact, it's just another stage in Angel's most dangerous hero's journey yet, of finding perfect pictures for his and Spike's two year wedding anniversary album.

Angel (worried): Are you sure this is a good idea?
Buffy (exasperated): Of course it is. I mean, if Spike's gonna be thrilled when you give him an album with pictures of all his favourite people, especially me, think how much more thrilled he'll be when he finds it also contains pictures of his favourite couple in all the world.
Angel (bewildered): Er - you mean me and him?
Buffy :rolls eyes: No, silly. I mean, you and me.
Angel :boggles a little: We're Spike's favourite couple?
Buffy :standing on tiptoe to pat Angel on the head, like he was a big but not terribly bright puppy: Sure we are. Spike loves you, Spike loves me, so he'll love the both of us together even more.
Angel (nervous): He will? You don't think he mightn't feel -oh, say, a tad undermined sexually, not to mention romantically, because of us having been an item once, what with the forever love of champions etc?
Buffy :laughs: Of course not. If I know one thing about Spike, it's that he has absolute total self-belief. You couldn't undermine him if you tried.
Angel :gives her an odd look: Yeah - right.
:However, he decides to go along with it, and anyway he's been undermined in every possible way at every turn ever since this business started. Time for Spike to suck it up instead:
:They start looking at pictures, and in spite of what she said, Buffy first picks up a picture of her on her own, from BtVS season 2, doing that staring under her brows at the camera thing that all the models do in the fashion magazines:
Buffy: How about this one? I look kind of cute in it, don't I?
Angel :laughs: You mean, in a slutty way? :puts his hand over his mouth: Sorry. I don't know why I said that.
Buffy (scowling): Me either - but you're right. Anyway, my hair's a mess.
:Angel meanwhile has picked up a picture of him on his own from the same season wearing a weird-looking brown velvet jacket:
Angel: This is nice.
Buffy (snatches it off him): You mean, in a trust me, I'm a gigolo way? :puts her hand over her mouth and speaks rather insincerely: Sorry. I don't know why I said that.
Angel (scowling too): No, you're right. And that jacket is just - weird.
Buffy :picks up a picture of her and Angel in season 2, with him holding her rather possessively: How about this? We look kind of mysterious and romantic.
Angel (worried that it's a bit too romantic): I don't think so. Spike'll only say we look like that couple from Twilight.
Buffy (surprised): But you're not even glittery!
Angel: Even so...
:They look again and at last settle for the big calendar picture, which again has some Twilight-y qualities, in that Angel looks all big and broody and like his life is terribly hard, while Buffy looks all young and innocent and virginal, but at least they're not hugging each other or even holding hands:
Buffy: You think Spike will like it?
Angel (wanting it all over and done with, and sure that when he finally does give the album to Spike, he'll be out on his ear a moment later): Oh, I think so.
Buffy: Now, how about one of me and Spike? We're definitely Spike's second-favourite couple, after you and me. Or maybe there's one of all three of us together?
:rummages in the box of photos, turns round, frowns: Angel, where'd you go?
:Angel runs like the clappers before things can get any worse:
Tune in next month for our penultimate chapter and find out if they did.

Comments

[elisi]

*happy sigh*

I do love how you write them! :)

[shapinglight]

You do? Thank you.

[http://users.livejournal.com/woman_of_/]

Oh I love it, Buffy is so delusional. No wonder Angel is worried. I think that picture is not going to make it!

[shapinglight]

I think that picture is not going to make it!

I think you may well be right. Heh!

[mere-ubu.livejournal.com]

:They look again and at last settle for the big calendar picture, which again has some Twilight-y qualities, in that Angel looks all big and broody and like his life is terribly hard, while Buffy looks all young and innocent and virginal, but at least they're not hugging each other or even holding hands:

Heee! He looks downright sulky in the big pic, doesn't he?

I'm very much enjoying Angel's discomfort and Buffy's cluelessness in this month's edition. I wonder what Spike will think of their choice?

[shapinglight]

Heee! He looks downright sulky in the big pic, doesn't he?

He does. Either that or he's wondering what's for dinner.

I wonder what Spike will think of their choice?

He'll either laugh like a drain or be horribly upset and Angel will have to buy him lots of presents to make up for it.

[hello-spikey.livejournal.com]

Wow. It's so strange to see Angel being the one possessed of clue.
*snickers*

Good plan, running like that, it was his only option.

(And incidentally smacks the calendar makers for HAVING a bangel month! Huff!)

[shapinglight]

It's so strange to see Angel being the one possessed of clue.

He learns eventually, poor thing.

As for Bangel month, I suppose the calendar makers were doing the smart thing and sticking the two eponymous characters together. Pity they managed to choose a picture where SMG only looks about 12.

[spikendru.livejournal.com]

But, it's the October calendar! So, obviously, the coupleness of Buffy and Angel is merely Halloween costumes. That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

[shapinglight]

Hee! Works for me.

[gillo]

But you're not even glittery!

Hee! There is definitely a sort of pale glow there, though. Subdued glitter?

[shapinglight]

Subdued glitter?

It could be, couldn't it? Nice to see you, btw. Are you okay?

[enisy.livejournal.com]

Teehee!

And yes. Edward/Bella = Angel/Buffy, in a lot of ways. (Which... is not a compliment.)

[shapinglight]

And yes. Edward/Bella = Angel/Buffy, in a lot of ways. (Which... is not a compliment.)

No, though at least Buffy has a bit more spunk than Bella - though it'd be hard to have less, in all honesty.

:Sigh: I used not to mind Bangel at all. It's the barmier type of Bangel 'shipper who have turned me against it.

[enisy.livejournal.com]

No, though at least Buffy has a bit more spunk than Bella - though it'd be hard to have less, in all honesty.

Buffy >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Bella. But even so, the Angel/Buffy dynamic is similar to the Edward/Bella dynamic, from some aspects.

:Sigh: I used not to mind Bangel at all. It's the barmier type of Bangel 'shipper who have turned me against it.

I still like Angel/Buffy as a 'ship; it's the fans and their deification of it that I don't care much for. Like... the Spike/Buffy threads in every forum I've been to have double or triple the posts of the Angel/Buffy threads, because the latter fans don't find any fault in their 'ship, or any doubts about its future. "It's a closed system", like King told me -- "its fans think it's basically perfect".

[shapinglight]

"It's a closed system", like King told me -- "its fans think it's basically perfect".

I don't often find anything he says I can agree with, but in this case, he's quite right.

[enisy.livejournal.com]

Ah, I agree with him quite often, now that we've talked things out and he doesn't have such a hate-on for Spike/Buffy. ;)

[shapinglight]

he doesn't have such a hate-on for Spike/Buffy. ;)

Not the impression I get from his comments in the Spuffy thread on Dark Horse.

[spikendru.livejournal.com]

the Angel/Buffy dynamic is similar to the Edward/Bella dynamic, from some aspects.

The absolutely creepiest line in the entire seven seasons of the show is Buffy's "When you kiss me I want to die". When it first aired, I was all "Buzzah? Huh?" and I still can't figure out how that line fits in. It seems so totally OOC for (early seasons) Buffy. (Although, I could definitely see S6 Buffy saying it to Spike, because . . . the whole ripped out of heaven depression seems more likely to lead to a death wish.) But for S2 Buffy? The one who stands up to Angelus and defiantly says "Me!" when he asks her what she has after everything else is stripped away? Not so much. That line has always seemed much too Bella-esque for Buffy, IMHO.

[shapinglight]

It's very Bella-esque, but then again, when Buffy said it, she was only 16. At that age, you tend to be a bit OTT about emotional stuff.

[diachrony.livejournal.com]

Awesome!!! :-D

[shapinglight]

Thank you.

[candleanfeather.livejournal.com]

Happy sigh. The year would be much less fun without Shapinglight's calendar. Hurray for our monthly treat. Thank you, Shapinglight.

[shapinglight]

Thank you for reading, and sorry to have been so slow responding. I've been away for the weekend. In fact, I was almost in France - Jersey, to be exact.